Picture thanks to Tom Phillips

Mondays.

On days such as these, I just do NOT want to be in the office or anywhere near work.  I am generally grouchy and it’s best to stay away.

There is something about Mondays that just pisses me off. So it is the day where work begins for most of us, cue nonsense people calling, work piling up and things that won’t work smoothly. I just end up like Garfield – wanted to pull my blanket over my head and hide from the world while I ‘work out’ my issues with the day. Don’t get me wrong, I generally like my work. I just despise Mondays.

Then I find out that a guy friend of mine got hitched over the weekend.  Cue small panic attack.

Just when you think that Monday couldn’t get worse, it almost imperceptibly does. So why am I all panicked?

To me, this friend represents the type of expat who maximises his time in Asia. The type who lives the bachelor high-life, who does not really commit and is totally living for the moment. Ok, to his advantage, he was going out with his current girlfriend for sometime before tying the knot but still, him getting married just brings out the totally irrational feelings in me. If this clown can get married to the ‘simple’ girl he desires, what about me?

*breathes into a brown bag* Ok, ok so having a pity party for one is not so hot. But I’m human that way.
Now, don’t get carried away and think that I have any feelings for this clown. I don’t and never did. It’s been an amusing ride, watching him go through all the motions and I’m glad that he’s found his right woman but this post is about me.

It’s incredible how female friends who get married don’t rankle as much. But when male friends do, it is a bloody event. I feel like a mother whose child has finally grown up and found his feet - a totally ‘aww, my boy is finally getting married’ misty moment. I guess it’s just the fact that I thought these guys would never tire and settle down. Why? Because at any one time, the guys are always ‘on the hunt’ they never seem satisfied with what they have. Somehow younger, bigger tits and sleeker or just generally better looking is what they seem to seek. Brains seem to be optional.

It’s like a swift kick in the stomach. It brings up questions like: What am I doing about my life? Why am I still single? Am I not meeting the right people?  Am I too cynical to love? Will I be alone? One particularly tragic-comic incident was the strange dream of me being married to Ryan Reynolds and having totally warm and fuzzy feelings (this is some weird Canadian connection, I’m sure) Am I going bonkers? ARGH! Channelling angst into my dreams! GAH!

I do get these feelings once in a while. Just a couple of twinges but nothing I can’t handle. To have the twinges extend to this is hysterically bad. *tries to calm down* Ok, ok…looks like some cheering up is inorder.  In view that this is a Monday, I guess I can get away with a small pity party.

Tomorrow, things will fall back into equilibrium. For now, I will panic and then get over it.