Rollercoaster, exhausting, whirlwind: three words I’d use to describe 2008. If you’ve been reading this blog, I am finally catching a breather by being on a well-deserved holiday now.

Work is mostly crazy and exhausting, especially in the latter half of the year. While madness prevailed at the beginning and middle of these projects, I did feel a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment by the time they concluded. A few of the projects were really interesting because of the new challenges they presented and the interesting people that I’ve come into contact with, while one project in particular one stuck out for being too ridiculous in the obstacles which kept being thrown at us. You know which one this is.

Where work is concerned, I’ve got a stronger perspective and I’m on surer footing of where I am headed. I just hope that people won’t overwork me as madly as they did this year. That above all was the most unrewarding part of the work; to be on endless projects without a breather or even a proper brief.

This year was also the year of the firsts. While I can’t mention all of them here, there are the highlights where I

• Explored the underground tunnels and war memorials of bloody hot Darwin under the watchful eye of the police
• Learned how to make spaghetti carbonara from scratch and appreciate jazz in a whole new light
• Had lots and lots of delicious martinis at Morton’s with many adventuresome friends
• Got me eyeballs sliced for vanity’s sake (yes, I am woman, hence vanity is mandated)
• Performed at a packed-out venues with many Ah Pek gatals (old pervs)
  
• Turned up at work as a clone
• Fell in love all over again with…my nieces from afar. As to whether I’ve have fallen in love, well, we’ll see….

This post is dedicated to the acquaintances who gradually became close friends that have shared a few exhilarating adventures and opened their lives to me. You guys made my life richer and that much more interesting for just being there.

Then there are the close friends who have moved away but it still feels as though they have never left. Despite being a continent away, they’re always clued into the best gossip. Dammit, macham wire service! Along the way I’ve turned away from people who have been less of a friend than someone I never really knew in the first place.

And then there are the loved ones who I had to say goodbye to. It’s inevitable but there have been one too many funerals in the family. I, for one will deeply miss you, mama.

On a personal reflection, I’ve learnt to let go somewhat and go with the flow. I guess this my way of managing my own expectations. Little by little, I’m better at recognizing that not everyone is as opinionated as I nor do they adhere to the same standards as me. Easier said than done and I’m still grappling with some of these expectations. Ah well…baby steps, right?

As for that New Year’s resolution? I’m definitely as keen as the next person to see what is in store for me. And yes, I do have some wishes and hopes for 2009 but these have to be kept in the heart, for only then would it come true :o)

Since I returned from Darwin, I’ve attended two funerals. One was my grandma and last night, I attended the wake of her sister (my grandaunt). It caught everyone by surprise that our grandaunt passed on so suddenly, for she was neither sick nor ailing.

It’s an emotionally battering period for everyone in the family when the matriarchs are slowly making their exits. My grandma and her sisters have held the family together for decades. Now there are so few of them left. These are the women who raised us, and taught us everything they knew.

And they were very talented too. Grandma and her sisters could make anything with their hands; from sewing the traditional kasut manek manek (beaded slippers), to cooking every single Peranakan dish, fashioning inventive desserts and birthday cakes, making clothes for the girls and just creating handicrafts out of household items. Come to think of it, they were the original Martha Stewart before she brought home-style living to popular culture today.

While almost all my aunts have inherited or learnt the crafts from our grandmothers, it’s sad that not many in my generation have done so. I’m probably one of the very few in the family who can still understand and converse in Peranakan and even whip up some of the dishes, while most of my cousins can’t.

While at the wake last night, my aunts came up to me to commend me on the eulogy that I delivered at Grandma’s funeral: “You sounded exactly like her, when you said that,” they commented. Ah, the anecdotes that I can tell from being raised by my grandparents! When such loving, yet strong-willed people raise you, it’s a wonder that you don’t start sounding or even behaving a little like them after some time.

From death my thoughts shifted to love. My old friend, Mr Mogel finally sent me a picture of his adorable kids. I’m not much of a fan of kids but the picture absolutely melted my heart, I’d post them online but I don’t know how comfortable he is about that, so I’ll refrain.

For a bittersweet moment, it made me long for things that I’ve much thought to lately and actually feel things that I’ve kept inside for so long.