Lately, the government’s call for more babies and promoting family life just pisses me off. I was looking through the 2008 Marriage & Parenthood Package and it just sets me off. Why? Because, while the government is getting all magnanimous with handing out the cash packages and bonuses for babies, they seem to be neglecting a sub-section of the women; the single mothers.

So we’re Asian, so what? Can’t Asian or Singaporean women choose to be single mothers too? And why are single mothers not entitled to the same benefits as the married ones? Single mothers’ experience the same things are married mothers, right? Or is there something here I don’t understand? My question is…why does the government choose to overlook single mothers? It can’t just be because of the conservative nature of the society that we live in. That’s too simplistic. Or is it?

Admittedly, not every woman desires or aspires toward motherhood but what if it is an accidental baby? Then would the single mother be forced to abort simply because the government frowns upon babies born out of wedlock? Or give her baby up to a married couple who would then be entitled to the bonus? What nonsense if that? Then I’d ask what if the said woman simply does not want a husband but was fully capable of raising a child on her own?

Adult women today are far more capable of raising a family and taking care of their careers than their counterparts from years before. It made me wonder: in trying to do the right thing, why can’t the government be humane as well? Why can’t we prevent cruel abortions and help these single mothers out instead? Understandably, the single mother may choose not to take up the incentive. That’s her prerogative. Would this increase irresponsible promiscuous behavior? I doubt so…because if you really do not want to undertake parenthood, you’d do everything in your power to prevent it.

At the end of the day, no matter how much incentives are handed out or dangled in front of us, getting married and having babies is a personal choice. I don’t see why as a single woman, I have to shackle myself to some guy if all I wanted was a child. I am completely capable of raising a child and working. Now why won’t the government support me? The child that I birth will go towards increasing the birth rate, right? What about the couples who marry but do not want to have children? Why can’t they be left alone without seeing all the nauseous family posters and shit around?

Sometimes, I wonder what goes on in the head of policy-makers…do they simply propose incentives to make themselves look good or is it really for the benefit of others?

I’d rather the government supported everyone who wanted to have a child instead of just saying only married couples are entitled to have children. What happened to giving people more options and choices and letting them decide for themselves?