Folded, unfolded and unfolding

Dating has surely evolved a whole bunch since the time I started.

Not that I've suddenly turned into a dinosaur or something but it seems that 'dates' today revolve more around animal attraction and sex. Maybe its the media, the advent of so many online dating sites or just that people seem to go out and hook up more. I don't know. Maybe it's the paradigm of the so called 'fast food generation' where people expect things to happen faster. Let's f@#^ now, go out NOW, live together NOW, let's get married NOW. It's crazy! Where is the sense of mystery and romance in going out with someone new?

Remember people, no one will buy the cow when they can get the milk for free. And it's no wonder that divorces are also more instant now.

Then there is interracial dating. Now, you'd think that this is a normal thing, after all, we're so globalized now, right? Wrong. Last weekend, I was having a drink with a guy friend when another friend walked by. She waved hi, and within the next second, did a double take at my companion, went 'oh' and walked away giggling. I was a little was slightly funny yet a bit disturbing. Why? Well, the friend I was having a drink with is West African. You'd think my other friend never saw a black man in her life. I thought, am I being overly sensitive? Was she laughing at me on a date? Or was it that having interracial friends are outside the norm?

If I was having a drink with a Caucasian or even Asian friend, she probably wouldn't look twice. It's odd, isn't it? There is still something to be said about people being very careful with who they associate with. Never mind that the friend I'm with is educated and has a good job, people just see black man and think 'danger'. Yet another example of media exposure or simply how we've been brought up?

I've dated guys outside my race before and I've never thought much about it. Perhaps its because I'm of dual race. I don't see anything wrong with dating any other race. I see the guy as simply another guy. What disturbs me about this whole thing is that people have double standards about interracial dating or even friends that you hang out with. Instead of questioning the choice or the race, shouldn't you be asking questions like: how is he treating you? What is he like? What are your similarities/differences?

I know that for some people, dating outside your race is something unthinkable.What I'm saying is that you should be more open-minded about it. If your friend chooses to do so, please do not go around labeling them with some derogatory name. If you start showing your prejudice, it allows others to start showing theirs too. Nothing ends a friendship faster than prejudice. Why can't we simply accept that the friend is seeing someone that really likes them? Wouldn't that be much easier playing the race card?

At the end of the day, interracial dating is something that we all have to be comfortable with. The world is growing smaller and so must our prejudices. So, go out, date whomever catches your fancy - and I mean date, as in go hang out first. That is probably the most fun part of getting to know a person. The rest will fall into place later.

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Ever prodded a sleeping dragon, only to have it whip up and bite you in the ass? Well, neither have I. But I advocate that you should try everything...once ;P


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