Helloo Monday!

I heard on the radio that today, 30 August 2010 is Talk Intelligently Day and incidentally also Toasted Marshmallow Day. Who the hell comes with this crap?

Ha, I guess it is talk bitchily day for me then.  Judging by this blog, it’s been somewhat of a career for me, not just a day :p

How on earth do you get people to talk intelligently? Is there a class you can send them to? How about something on the internet?

Intelligence seems to be the missing ingredient these days. It's a given that people talk but isn't there anything intelligent to say other than stating the obvious? I’m cool with people being bimbotic, gosh knows I have plenty of those moments. There are also times when you make the most silly or naive comments. Those are ok too. No one is freaking prefect.

My pet peeve are the people who make the most inane, dumbass comments and think that they are smart or witty. These would be the same people who think that irony and sarcasm are vitamin supplements. Lately, there happens to be a dearth of moments like these with my jolly clients, or rather, client. It makes you think: “Are they kidding me?” And then they proceed to stun you with a follow-up comment that cements their lack of brain cells, going: “What do you think?”

Other than yelling, “Are you out of your freaking mind?!” The stunned silence is probably the most polite thing I can manage in that moment. All I can say is that I am truly grateful for the mute button on phones. Most times, that helps me assimilate my thoughts into something more rational, tactful and constructive. Other times, it masks the sound of me banging my head on the table or giggling my ass off.

The other thing that riles me are Singaporeans who constantly bitch about foreign talent. When you question them about their derision, have you ever heard a single intelligent and viable response? NO. Why? Because then they would have to spend a bit more time and brain cells to carve out a response...and we all don't have time for that. It's the government's job. Will Singaporeans ever want to do anything about it? NO. So you bitch to no end over nothing. Idiots.

Passive-aggressive people, you are on the hit list too. Grow some balls, a spine, something and for god’s sake, DO SOMETHING. All the gumption that you have in the world will not make up for the credibility you lose for not saying or doing anything. All the contained aggression you have will gestate and then implode, and then you will be a platter on the sidewalk. That’s spontaneous explosion for you.

Ah Mondays... Sometimes you have to let out some of that inner aggression kept from the week. This will be followed by a bout of Toasted Marshmallows when I get home.

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Ever prodded a sleeping dragon, only to have it whip up and bite you in the ass? Well, neither have I. But I advocate that you should try everything...once ;P


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