If blogging is cyber diarrhea and then online, I am Kate Moss. ;o)

Have you ever been in a situation where you could have helped someone in trouble but didn't do so because of circumstances? Whether it's the man in the street or the person closest to you, oftimes, you just have no control over anything. You realize that what people are doing to themselves is more damaging than what you initially thought.

Here's a rhetorical question: If you gave an opinion to someone, would you stick by it no matter what or would you be flexible enough to change your mind if things don't work out?

Say you've been going out with your crush and things were working fabulously. You've told all an sundry that this may be The One! Your family likes him and his manners and thinks that he can do no wrong...You're excited, there's a tingly feeling each time you meet, you float on air, etc, etc, etc...Your buds however, have found him nice enough but they've mentioned that something's a little off when he hangs out with them. Then one day you stumble on the fact that the bastard is cheating on you. And that gasp, he's done it with a few other women and that it's a pattern of some sort. When asked, he comes back all hearts and flowers - he's apologetic, he brings flowers and then - gasp! He even asks you if you want to go on an overseas assignment with him! Ah, the endless possibilities of young love!

What do you do? Do you stick it out with the bastard in hopes that things you will be the one to 'change' him eventually? Afterall, he's asked you to trvel with him! OMG! Or do you run to your friends who will in all honesty will probably say "I told you so'? Or will they just say it because they are jealoous of you and your honey? Or do you just play the martyr; just go for the trip? Who knows where this will lead? Just let him do whatever he pleases! Fuck those jealous bunnies that've been badmouthing your love! You can make new friends! He'll probably stop cheating when he sees what a fabulous girlfriend you are - screw all detractors!

Or do you just wait for some glorious knight in shining armour to save you from your fate or word of God to help you see things clearly? Hah - even I don't believe in this one.

You are confused, lost and exhausted. Mentally drained does not suit you but lately you've been touting it like Linus' security blanket...You family's all aghast. But he's been good to you! You have to give him a chance or else how will you know him better?

My two cents? You have to make up your own mind.

You have to make a stand and tell your family your decision regardless of what you choose. They will eventually come to see your point of view.

Your friends will tell you - ha! We've seen that one coming for months! But if they are good enough friends, they'll also give you the benefit of the doubt, ask you some tough questions and tell you stuff that you will not be prepared to hear. And after all that, if you have been honest enough, they'll let you cry on their shoulder and help you gain a footing on what you want to do next. You have to realize that nothing comes easy - sometime you pick the most horrendous lemons, believing that you are right. But inevitably, you always have to fight for what's best for yourself because, NO ONE will do it for you. No matter how easy it seems to let someone come and make things easier...

Sure, some friends are as flaky as they come and will leave you at the slightest sign of trouble. They're cool, they'll trash talk when times are good and come across as understanding but the moment you ask for a favour, these people are out the door like the Flash with his pants on fire. They sure are entertaining but at what expense?

I should know - these are some the shoes that I've worn over the years. Sometimes I see the same footwear being worn by people around me and I'm torn by my innate kaypoh-ness. I should help! These peopl could do with a dose of reality! But then again, I've also come to the realization that no matter how much help you offer, nothing will come out of it unless the person chooses to help themselves.

So observe I shall and hold my peace I will.